maybe this would work better than the one i'm using now?

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Compliments of wordle

chilly (economic) climate blues

If misery truly does love company then I feel as though I should invite everyone over for wine and cheese (it will have to be Franzia and Kraft American Singles though as I am B-R-O-K-E). I'm living in the Great Depression Part Deux in The Frigid Winter That Will Never End; at least that's what it feels like with no income. The job hunt has reached a new level on the "oh shit" scale having just received a rejection letter to job #106 (a job I would have loved and rocked at!). I spend most of my mornings glued to the computer searching for employment and to prevent myself from scratching out my own eyeballs, I read blogs to escape for a moment. Unfortunatley, the tone of many local blogs mimics mine. I usually find solace in commiseration, but now I am overwhelmed by the number of other bloggers who are down in the dumps. It frustrates me that at a time when all I have is time to write, I am so uninspired to do so. I've tried to sit and write and twitter several times but the panicky knots in my stomach see to it that I don't type a word.

In addition to my forced writer's block, the fact that winter won't let up isn't helping. My thermostat stays at 66 regardless of how cold it is outside and that is why I have trouble accepting my gas bill which has tripled since last year. After a little research I found that since gas usage is down 25% (most likely due to people trying to save money and the environment) The state allowed the utility companies to raise their rates by 25%. Hmmmm...that makes sense! Now our asses will freeze along side our assets. I mean have you ever really scrutinized your utility bills? Most of the balance comes from taxes and applicable fees, not from the actual usage. Why do I have an "energy adjustment charge" that is half of the bill?!?!? It's all a racket. Now, I'm all riled up!!!! Now I understand why I have been so reluctant to "tickle the ivories" lately.

So many things need to happen to fix the things that are making us all so glum. It's to much to think about. I hope everyone can find some simple (free) pleasures to fill your hearts. Your blogs are definitely some of mine! This is what I would love to do one day downtown: ! Hugs to you Cleveland

will work for food...and a salary with benefits

I don't want this blog to turn into a "i'm jobless, feel sorry for me" diatribe, but I think I could use a healthy dose of pity right about now so, I'M JOBLESS! FEEL SORRY FOR ME!" I'll spare you my own overly, wordy description of my feelings and let Winona do the talking:



OK, so I wasn't the Valedictorian of my class, but I did graduate Cum Laude. My pride went out the window somewhere before Thanksgiving when I realized looking for "the" job needed to turn into looking for "a" job. Still, no dice. I had 4 interviews last week and 2 this week. I have written and re-written my resume and am still not convinced it expresses my skill set and talents in a cohesive manner. Employers always want to see candidates with direct experience in the position for which they are applying. I get that; it's an easy, no brainer to hire someone who has worked previously in a similar role. I just wish someone would recognize that just because a candidate does not have previous experience in the exact job function does not mean that individual wouldn't excel in that position. I'm just sayin.' Aren't you glad I spared you the wordy description?

caper's criticism #2 - medical mart

So I promised myself I wasn't going to opine on the whole medical mart debacle, but alas her I am! (I've also decided to start using upper case letters in my posts as it makes it easier to read:) Anyhowsers, I don't generally give a flip about the foibles and mistakes of politicians and their decisions, but I feel the need to put my two cents in and who knows, maybe Frank Jackson reads blogs anonymously? I think of it in terms of my own life. Allow me to set the scene for you a bit. I live in a 500 sq. ft. apt.; it's not a lot of space by any means and I can't wait to be able to live in a bigger space. My closet-sized living space means I have little to no room to aquire things that I want. For instance, I am in LOVE with this table from World Market. I would love to HAVE the table but I don't have anywhere to put it. Similarly, "the city" can't decide where to put the Medical Mart. Now maybe this is slightly different than not having room for it, but the fact that there isn't an obvious venue site should be a huge red flag.
Cleveland already has a convention center AND a football stadium (that is rarely used) AND an arena AND a baseball stadium...see where I am going with this?! Cleveland is chock full o' venues, what it is lacking is the events to host. Just like I can eat at my kitchen counter instead of my beloved table, Cleveland should start using and booking the spaces it has instead of trying to build new ones.2 If I had the space, you can be sure I would be having dinner parties at my place all the time! (you're all invited, but it's BYO;). The last thing this city needs is new real estate!!! It's not going to be an "if you build it, they will come" kind of situation. Instead, I propose the city adopts a "if you HOST it, they will come" mentality. Cleveland has great restaurants that in my opinion are reason enough to make a trip here. The dining alone is a great foundation to support the tourism that large events would spur. Clevo just needs to start thinking outside of the box and use more creativity to draw people here. We have PLENTY of space already, we don't need a new convention center, what we need is to give people a reason to come here. We have to bring sexy back to the city! Damn, I wish I could be the event planner for the city!
Today is my last day of work (anyone hiring?:) so as you can imagine I am in a bit of a financial crisis not knowing where my next paycheck is coming from. My situation seems to mimic that of the city: no jobs, no money. This is yet another reason the Medical Mart is a bad idea. It will do nothing but drain the city's already stretched bank account and it will not generate a return for many years. Is Cleveland financially viable enough to wait to see such a return on its invested capital? Am I the only one that thinks it strange that this Med Mart will be publicly funded but privately run. Hmmm...I have so many questions! I am interested to hear what others think. I wonder if my views are a bit shortsighted? What do you think?

i <3 you cleveland

i woke up super early this morning because i am giddy with excitement for my valentine's day adventure i have planned for the boyf! after five years, i swear i have fallen in love all over again. the boy still gives me butterflies! i am one lucky caper! i've never been into valentine's day, most likely because i've worked in restaurants my whole life and have come to hate the contrived celebration. i definitely steer clear of restaurants on v-day, but this year i thought we could do something different. First, it's heart shaped french toast and most likely "mimosas." I use the quotes because we use a loose definition of the word. Our brunchy drinks aren't so much champagne as they are rum. we rationalize that as long as we call any alcoholic beverage consumed before noon a "mimosa" then it is acceptable. So after drinking it only makes sense that we are going to ogle the 4 door jeep wrangler (he has been talking about it forever and i thought it would be fun as i also have a hard on for the wrangler). honestly, car browsing is pretty fun sometimes. then since we both looooooooooove skee-ball, i am taking him to the winking lizard in lakewood, where i've been told they have skee-ball. it should be super fun! although nothing beats playing skee-ball on the boardwalk at the jersey shore with a funnel cake in one hand and surrounded by guidos in mesh tank tops. seriously, guys, woven dental floss a shirt does not make, but i digress. anyway, after that we might catch a movie and share a milkshake with 2 straws. sigh...what are you doing to celebrate love today? anyway, i'm sending the love and want you all to be my valentine! Kisses Cleveland!

I will leave you with my fave scene from one of the greatest films of all time. Oh, Nino Quincampoix! True love is riding on the back of a boy's motorbike:)

i crush hard on the tragically misunderstood

you know what i mean, boys that look a little anemic, have tattoos, appear as though they take bi-weekly showers (but actually put effort into looking like they put in zero effort) and as a bonus have awesome facial hair. am i alone in the scruffy love ladies? mmm, i love a good 'stache/beard...the more creative the better. oh! i'm getting all hot and bothered! the only thing that's better than a boy that looks like this is a boy who looks like this that can write and sing; put all of these qualities in a blender and you get these fine boys, who are both coming to town to sing to me, i mean us:



Ray LaMontagne @ The State Theater 4/17



Butch Walker @ The Grog Shop 3/11

see you there...grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrowwwww!

Caper's Criticism #1

Dear Cleveland Drivers,

I know this comes a few days late, but I needed time to cool off so I wouldn't write things I didn't mean. Let's talk about driving in the winter time. As natives, I am sure you have adapted to traveling in inclement weather, but as I rove the highways and byways of this city, it is my observation that you may have only adapted in mind and not body. Driving in slippery, icy, snowy, wet conditions means that you have to change some of your behaviors. Last time I checked, 4-wheel drive was not a standard option on most American made sedans/coupes so you might want to consider driving a little slower. I mean have you ever seen a Dodge Neon or Chevy Cobalt in a collision?! It's like a recycled soda can. Seriously, SLOW DOWN! Honestly, I don't care what happens to you, but I would be pissed if when your shitbox spun out of control, I died as a result. Also, I know (at least on the west side) the roads are wide enough for two cars to barely drive next to one another. Evidently, the city sees no reason to paint lines to denote separate lanes. It's as though the roads were designed by the kindergarten teacher who wants us to be expressive and "do what we feel." I find it "funny" that the drivers here are empowered to decide how many lanes of traffic there are. I would also like to address passing on the right. I'm from Jersey, we invented it! It's a dick thing to do, and while I recognize that it is sometimes unavoidable (due to the jackholes that don't realize that if people are passing you on the right YOU'RE NOT DRIVING FAST ENOUGH!!!) it is absolutely unacceptable to due when the roads are covered in snow. Please try to be a little more careful out there on the roads. I'll be watching you...and most likely giving you the finger.

Love,
The Caper

P.S. Could you guys also start using your blinkers? By this I mean, when I am behind you at a traffic light and you plan on turning, could you indicate your intentions early enough for me to get out from behind you and make the light? That would be greaaaaaaaaat! Also, please remember to put a cover on all of your TPS reports.

"is this real life?"

touche kid...i ask myself the same thing everyday that i wake up jobless and under a fresh sky smiting amount of snow:)

lakewood love

so on my way to the gym i wanted to check out nature's bin, as i am in the market for some new, natural beauty products. they have quite an impressive selection of natural/organic/environmentally friendly toiletries, just not the ones i wanted. the trip wasn't a total bust though as i discovered their prepared food section and the fact that they carry hansen's soda. i first discovered hansen's while living in phoenix and became hooked on the diet root beer. before we packed up and moved to cleveburg, i bought 2 six packs to last me a while (i might drink 1 a week) as i was under the impression that these fizzy delights were only available out west. well i have never been so happy to be wrong. although nature's bin is a bit pricey, most stores of this kind are. i decided to try their baked potato soup and some couscous salad and will definitely go back to try more of their prepared food...especially their baked goods (even the vegan stuff looks yummy!)

happy puppy bowl sunday!

so i'm definitely the type that watches the super bowl for the commercials. i don't understand the allure of sports. however, my dog lovin' mama just called me and told me to turn on animal planet because the puppy bowl is on. oh, man is it cute! sometimes baby animals (especially dogs) are so cute i want to squish their faces!!! anyway, if you love dogs as much as i do, turn on animal planet and watch matilda the beagle score another touchdown. who says chicks can't play football? you can read her bio here and nominate your fave li'l player for MVP. have a happy super bowl all:)